Marriage & Motherhood.. The Truthiest Truth

I love my husband and children more than the moon and the stars. I love the life we’ve built and all the paths we’ve walked—every good, bad, and downright ugly step of it. But that doesn’t mean it was always easy. Or enjoyable. Or even remotely sane. That's simply the truth about marriage and motherhood.

What, you ask, is hard?

Absolutely all of it.

And I’m going to spill some truths—the kind no one ever tells you. Everyone loves to post the highlight reel: the smiling photos, the sweet moments, the curated joy. But buckle up, because sometimes you have to walk through the pits of hell and push through a few emotional hurricanes just to ride the rainbow. And I’m going to talk about it. All of it.

A quiet little ring sitting in satin - holding decades of chaos, compromise and commitment. And somehow, it still shines.

Some Housekeeping for the Assumers

Do I think everyone should get married? No.

Do I think everyone should have kids? Also no, but in purple.

Am I happy that I got married? Yes.

Am I happy that I had children? A very loud YES.

Do I cringe every time someone asks, “When are you getting married?” or “When are you having kids?” Absolutely.

Life choices aren’t one-size-fits-all. These were my choices, and I expect everyone else to make theirs based on their own goals, wants, needs, and the picture they’ve painted for their life.

I’m a founding member of Do What Feels Right for You.

There’s zero agenda and all acceptance here at Ducking Bullship—just some real talk from someone who’s lived it, felt it, and isn’t afraid to say it.

How It Started

I’ve dated enough people to know that finding someone who shares your values and life vision is... a journey. I’ve seen enough friends start over when things didn’t work out. I got lucky.

One night, a random stranger butted into my conversation. He was stubborn, opinionated, and somehow... perfect. We became fast friends. A few years later, we started dating. And now? I’ve been with my other half for over 22 years.

How It’s Going

The road to where we are now was rough.

Some of it was our own doing. Some of it was just life being life.

Before kids, our highs were Afroman high and our lows were depths-of-hell low. It was a truly broken road. After kids, the highs stayed high, and the lows weren’t quite as deep.

We complement each other. He excels where I lag, and vice versa. We don’t always see eye to eye, but we do listen. We hear each other out. Sometimes I’m right. Sometimes he is. (But don’t tell him I said that.)

We don’t fight. Not just not in front of the kids—we don’t fight, period. We disagree. We speak our truth, lay it out, and move on. Screaming, yelling, or staying mad? Not my vibe. Get it out, get over it, move on. The end.

We’re a united front when it comes to parenting or outside intrusions—even if we disagree. I’ll defend my husband in his wrongness, stand by his side, and then tell him he’s a jerk in private. It works for us. Because he’s not just my husband—he’s my partner.

But Let’s Be Clear…

This life—while mostly mellow—didn’t just show up with a bow on it. 🎀

It took work. It still takes work.

And while I still dream of throat-punching him on occasion, I use my words instead.

Because I’m an adult??

Pull up a cup!

☕ Sit with Me While We Sip Tea

Marriage is messy. Motherhood is the best kind of madness.

And I know I’m not the only one who’s ever wanted to scream into a throw pillow, laugh at the chaos, or wonder who put us in charge.

This isn’t a parenting blog. It’s a fireside chat for those of us navigating life without a map—surviving on caffeine, chaos, and the occasional cry-laugh.

Subscribe below so you don’t miss Part 2—because the truthiest truths are still steeping.