Friendzies: Stop Collecting Red Flags and Fake Friends

Your Mean Girls guide for Real Life.

👀 Human Behavior Is My Favorite Sport 🏈

I like to watch people. Human behavior is my favorite spectator sport. Maybe its the Virgo in me. Maybe it's the analytical brain or the 80s childhood. Maybe it's Maybelline. Whatever it is - I see what others don't know they're sharing. How people truly are when they don't think anyone's watching. I like to formulate my own opinions on people. Sally and Susie can say a whole lot, without saying anything at all. Watching 👀, you can see the sly looks or the mean comments cause "just kidding!" of course; or the love you sister said dripping malice and disrespect. How people speak of you when you leave the room or even in a public setting like social media, tells a story. What's shocking to me though, how do people not see the frenemy sitting on their couch? They're right there, in plain sight. Those people aren't there to help you elevate. No girl. They picked a front row seat hoping to get high on your lows.

Believe What People Show You 🚩

When people show you who they really are, believe them. That right there is one of the problems in the world today. People are so desperate for love and acceptance that they wear rose colored blinders and take every platter of shitty disrespect handed to them in the name of "that's just how they are". Lets sit down and talk about this, shall we?

Love, in any form, shouldn't hurt.

Healthy relationships don't include walking on eggshells.

Are you always worrying about not shaking the metaphorical boat? Words said in "jest" that make you feel lacking...less than? That's toxic.

The Red Flag easily spotted in the open beach.

Rock That Boat! 🛶

Me personally - I will rock that bee-atch until we damn near capsize and then help us paddle back to shore. Why? Because I am comfortable bringing the uncomfortable truth to the forefront for my friends. I want to see my friends thrive.

You can't break a cycle you don't see.

You can't fix something you believe is only bent, not broken.

🍾 The Lie of the "Good Time" Friend 🎉

Why spend your precious minutes with someone who wants you to feel less than? With those who want to see you uncomfortable in your skin? Who embarrasses you or hits you where it hurts - metaphorical or literally? The ones who wouldn't dream to defend you at the table or in the other room. The ones who throw dirt on your name every time they find some grass.

All because they're a good time?

Miss me with that.

If I want a good time, I'll curl up in my cocoon of beanbag and blankets with a book and leave reality behind.

What Real Friendship Looks Like 💕

Friendship, at its true depth is support. Sharing your life which includes lifting each other up, sharing in joy and sorrow, sharing opinions and ideas. You should be able to share not only your personal glowing win, whatever that looks like for the day, but also your dark moments where you want to rage, cry or both. Both the biggest wins and emotional wreckage. Sometimes it's uncomfortable, but not in the name of malice. Sometimes the conversations are hard, but not degrading.

Your story should be safe in the hands of your friend.

Anything less than that, is unacceptable.

That is literally the lowest bar of friendship.

🔥 When Trust Turns Tragic ⚠

This isn't just about petty shade or social slip-ups. Sometimes, the stakes are heartbreakingly high.

This world we've created is a dangerous place. Sometimes people don't just dim your light - they extinguish it.

We see it. Read it. Lived it. Far too many times.

Tragedy strikes when trust is misplaced. Because they were never your friend to begin with.

Best case - Your bestie steals your spouse.

Cool, chuck them both in the trash and start over.

Worst case - Someone ends up murdered or "missing" because someone they trusted beat them, burned them, pushed them off a cliff or 100 other deadly things.

🎪 Red Flags are for the Circus

Humans are....more predictable than anyone notices.

The signs are there. The people around you see it.

You can only hold so many red flags before you become the circus.

💡Some Final Truths

If you take nothing else out of anything I’ve written, please remember that:

You matter.

Healthy relationships don't hurt.

You'll find your people.

Don't settle for the trash that wants to strip away your light, Because they may take it all.

Never apologize for rocking the boat.

Stay Feral Friends!

Let's Talk About It 💭

If you've stayed this long - let's talk about some fake friends in the comments. Your complete Mean Girl guide in real life - No pink on Wednesday required.